Scottish for a Night

Last night I had the pleasure of judging From Scotland With Love (aka Dressed to Kilt), the Highlands-inspired fashion show and charity auction. Each year a bunch of celebs, from Hollywood actors to Scottish rugby players, throw back Chivas on the rocks and get tartaned up in kilts, trews and whatnot for a good cause (Wounded Warrior Project and Cash for Kids). Highlights from the evening…

  • Borrowing a Vivienne Westwood statement suit, a three-piece tartan number fitted on top and drop-crotched on bottom.
    – Having Fred Schneider fix my tie backstage to achieve a perfect tie dimple.
    – Sitting within earshot of co-judge Wendy Williams (“Her slit is so high you can almost see her Highlands”), as if her stacked diamond rings weren’t distraction enough.
    – Being seated next to and under the platform runway. How else were we to know if the kilts were being worn properly?
    – Exchanging winks with Glenn O’Brien, another co-judge, over what appeared to be a few girls gone commando. 
    – Watching New York City ballet dancer Tom Gold twirl down the catwalk in his kilt.
    – Joe Boxer’s Nick Graham reaching the end of runway and flashing the audience with his…boxers.
    – Remembering that Kiefer Sutherland and Chris Noth flashed last year’s audience with their actual asses (and back of you know what—Google it), and hoping there’d be more of that. There wasn’t.
    – Learning later that a Holland & Sherry kilt donated by Sean Connery raised a nice chunk of money for the two charities.

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