Morrissey Is Half a Man, But a Whole Candle

Stop us if you’ve heard this one before. When it comes to post-punk 80s music, few can hold a candle to the sharp-tongued, brassy-voiced Morrissey. The folks at the New York label Black Sheep & Prodigal Sons certainly seem to think so. They’ve created a beeswax sculpture in the singer’s likeness, complete with a flammable wick, Barrymore collar, and flipped quiff guaranteed to make your collection of antique Delft plates look like cafeteria trays. A literal spin on the hit single Half a Person, these candles are limited to 600 and are, unlike Morrissey’s brand of urban angst, 100% sustainable, responsibly sourced, and naturally honey-scented.


At just over 9 inches tall, Half a Person is the latest gem from the waxworks industry. Tobias Wong’s New York Times candle was released earlier this year, but Moz’s entry has the slight edge, sure to elicit a deluge of Smiths-inspired puns (There Is a Light that Will Go Out, Hair on Fire). Priced at a cool $185, it’s a conversation piece that rightly parallels our treasured relationship with the band’s discography, best used during those catatonic late nights as we climb into our empty beds and, well, enough said.

Half a Person candle is on pre-order until September 20 at Occulter.org

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