Like a Kardashian, Karl Lagerfeld is increasingly the king of endorsements and the kaiser of kitsch—ironic, self-aware, stylish kitsch, mind you. In defense of three quite kitschy commercials he’s directed for Magnum ice cream bars—which he says he can’t eat, presumably under dietician’s orders—he quipped in a press thingy yesterday, “I made advertisements for Dom Pérignon champagne, and I don’t drink alcohol. I’m a dress designer and I don’t wear dresses.” That does make sense. Is there anything he wouldn’t lend his name, image or eye to? Meat and condoms, he said. Probably a wise decision.